Coworkers Facing Grief Together

Grief is a natural part of life. Whether it’s expected or sudden, we will all face loss at some point. It’s common to experience grief in our workplace as well as in our personal lives, and there’s no company handbook dedicated to the grieving process. Everyone will deal with the loss differently, but there are ways to grieve together and process the loss without disrupting work functions.

What is Workplace Grief?

There are several types of loss within the workplace, such as death, retirement, unemployment, personal injury, and transitioning to a different position or location. When facing the death of a coworker, there can be additional variables that influence the way people react, including the age of the deceased, how long they worked there, whether it was sudden, and the nature of the relationships they had within the workplace.

Grief is our reaction to a loss of any kind. Typically, there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Everyone handles it differently, and there is no timetable. However, if grief is left unprocessed, it may lead to problems with anxiety or depression.

Coworkers struggling with grief typically display some of the following symptoms:

• Physical: changes in appetite and sleep, headaches, stomach pain, lack of concentration, fatigue, restlessness, drug or alcohol use
• Emotional: sadness, fear, anxiety, lack of trust, irritability, depression, guilt, lowered confidence
• Vocational: low morale, anger (usually directed at their employer), lowered interest or motivation, a desire to quit

Occasionally, an employer may offer flexibility with work hours for a grieving employee. This may prove helpful, but it’s important to recognize that some people find the daily work routine to be a necessary distraction to aid in the healing process.

Handling the Death of a Coworker

Grief is a universal response, but no two people will deal with loss exactly the same. The following tips may help you work through your pain and give you permission to grieve:

1. Respect the relationships. You might have been closer to the deceased coworker than others in the workplace or vice versa. Everyone’s relationship with the deceased will be different. While it is acceptable to ask a grieving coworker how they’re doing, you should refrain from trying to “fix” them in their difficult time. Understanding these dynamics will help everyone through the grieving process. It is never helpful to tell someone to “get over it” or “snap out of it.”
2. Talk about it. Feel free to talk about how the loss if affecting you even if management is not formally addressing it. Don’t be afraid or nervous to share how you’re feeling with coworkers. Listen to their experience as well as it can be mutually beneficial.
3. Give back. Ask your employer about ways you can formally and informally grieve together. Consider ideas to support the coworker’s family and honor the deceased’s life. Some ideas might include planting a tree, hosting a fundraiser, establishing a college fund for their children, or finding other ways to give back to the community. Perhaps you can hold a workplace memorial service to share funny stories and celebrate their life. Laughter and tears are both part of the grieving process.
4. Use resources. Many workplaces have employee assistance programs that offer grief counseling, either individually or in a group. If not, they might connect you and other coworkers to various support groups and resources within your community.
5. Permission. Sometimes we don’t know why one death hits harder than another. Give yourself permission to grieve, even if you didn’t know the person very well. You may experience increased fatigue or feel distracted on the job. These are normal reactions to grief. Talk with your employer if you are having difficulty adjusting back to your work routine.

Keep in Mind

After a significant loss in the workplace, it’s important to take care of yourself. Remember to get the proper amount of sleep, seek out the support you need, and practice stress-reducing activities. Sometimes helping another person through their struggle can give you peace during yours. No one should determine what is “grief-worthy” for someone else. If you feel stuck in a grieving cycle, consider talking with your doctor, religious leader, or a therapist.

Sources:

National Institute of Health EAP. Coworkers facing grief together. Opens in a new window Accessed March 18, 2025.

Centerforloss.com. Helping a Grieving Friend in the Workplace. Opens in a new window Published December 21, 2023. Accessed March 18, 2025.

Fsap.cornell.edu. Death of a Colleague. Opens in a new window Published September 30, 2024. Accessed March 18, 2025.

Last updated: April 30, 2025

By: © PAS Wellbeing Media, LLC