These days, families may be spread across the country or even across the globe. When a loved one needs caregiving and lives far away, it can make an already challenging situation more complicated. But the truth is, there are many ways long-distance caregivers can help.

Getting started

Taking on a new role as a long-distance caregiver may feel overwhelming. The good news is that there is no right way to be a caregiver. Whether you’re helping your loved one find care, providing emotional support or assisting with finances, these suggestions might help.

Find out what’s needed. Ask your loved one or the primary caregiver how you can help. Get more information on your loved one’s health conditions, medications and treatments. Visit your loved one to see the condition of their home and how well their needs are being met.
Make a contact list. Consider keeping contact info for anyone close with your loved one, such as friends, neighbors or siblings who live in the area. These people may be able to give a view of your loved one’s needs, chip in with day-to-day needs or help provide care in an emergency.
Plan for emergencies. Consider saving money and setting aside time to help you prepare for unexpected visits with your loved one.
Talk to other caregivers. Consider joining a support group or talking with friends or family who care for a loved one. They may be able to provide support and tips.
Organize information. Consider creating a file for your loved one’s medical, legal or financial information. Include contact info for doctors, lawyers or other professionals. And keep any important paperwork, such as medical records, insurance information or legal documents. You’ll also need written permission from your loved one to access their health information.
Identify services. Note local agencies and departments providing community services that may help your loved one. Every area is different, but service programs may include home delivered meals, volunteer services, support groups and transportation. To find services like these, use the Eldercare Locator or search the internet for “Area Agency on Aging” in your state.

Tips for long-distance caregiving

If you’re sharing caregiving responsibilities, consider these tips:

Get everyone’s input. Discuss your loved one’s needs and divide up tasks. Involve your loved one in making decisions and listen to their needs and wishes.
Communicate regularly. Set aside a regular time when you can call your loved one to stay in touch. It may be helpful to regularly speak to those helping in your loved one’s care.
Consider your strengths and abilities. How often can you reasonably call or visit? Are you comfortable handling your loved one’s finances? Are you able to attend medical appointments or speak to your loved one’s doctor? Think about what you excel at and what you are reasonably able to do.
Take care of yourself. Just as with any other type of caregiving, taking care of yourself is important. If you are sick, tired or out of patience, your ability to help your loved one can be hampered. Be sure to get plenty of rest, eat healthy meals, exercise regularly, stay connected with supportive friends and family, and find ways to manage stress. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.

Make the most of visits

Many long-distance caregivers want to make the most of the time they’re able to spend with their loved one. Try these tips to help use your time together more effectively:

Have fun. Try to spend some bonding time with your loved one doing activities that are not caregiving related. It’s important to schedule some time to relax.
Plan and attend appointments. Try to schedule doctor’s appointments, legal appointments or other important appointments during times you can attend.
Ask questions early. Before you visit, ask your loved one if there is anything they need help with during your visit. For example, is there a home repair that you can help with?
Reassess needs. Visits are a good time to check how your loved one is doing. Is the home still safe? Is your loved one eating well? You may also want to check in with your contacts in the area to see if they’ve noticed any changes in your loved one.

Long-distance caregiving can be a tricky business. But with planning, patience and understanding, it may be more manageable.

Sources:

Alzheimer’s Association. Long-distance caregiving. Accessed Feb. 20, 2024.

Department of Health and Human Services. Eldercare Locator. Accessed Feb. 20, 2024.

National Institute on Aging. What is long-distance caregiving? Oct. 12, 2023.

National Institute on Aging. Sharing caregiving responsibilities. Oct. 12, 2023.

National Institute on Aging. Taking someone to a doctor’s appointment: tips for caregivers. Oct. 12, 2023.

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